I’m thirty-one.  There I admitted it.  Thirty-one and OK with it.  What I’m not OK with is a little thing we call gravity.  What goes up must come down.  Who says?  Well, Newton of course.  I have news for Mr. Newton.  Last night I defied gravity.  Oh yes I did!

I walked into the store last night a tiny bit intimidated.  I had one thing on my mind.  That was finding the bra that my friend had (Hi Deanna!). After nursing three kids, my girls followed Newton’s law.  I just wasn’t OK with that.  I needed the perkiness that I already new this certain bra would give me.

I was greeted by a nice saleslady.  I’ll call her “B” because that’s what her name started with and it’s easier than typing saleslady.  B asked if she could help.  I told her I was looking for a bra.  We walked to that section.  I was immediately overwhelmed by the choices.  She noticed my expression.  B asked what kind I needed.  I only had two things in mind: perky girls and a little bit of padding.  I explained that I worked with all men and she told me we would find one that kept the headlights on dim.  I knew then I was in good hands!

She measured me and told me a size I was sure Shamu could wear.  Then she handed me a couple bras to try on.  I noticed they were two sizes smaller than she measured.  I tried them on and was not happy with the results.  The cups bulked out.  I could not have that.  I told B and she got me more to try.  After about the sixth one, she told me to let her know when I got it on.  Here is the conversation that followed.

B:  Do you have it on?

Me: Yes, ma’am.

B: Let me see.

Me:  I don’t have my shirt on!

B: Well, Hun, I can’t see your bra with your shirt on.

Me:  Oh… yea… OK…. hang on.

I reluctantly open the door and she comes in.  She begins pushing and shoving the girls where they needed to be.  Then she fiddled with the straps.  I could only think one thing, SHE BETTER MAKE BEGA BUCKS FOR THIS JOB!  I stood there literally speechless until she was finished.  Then she moved back.  I looked in the mirror.  This lady knew her bras!  The girls were perky!  I, with the help of B, had accomplished what I went to do: Make the girls perky.  I even accomplished something else!  I defied gravity.  These girls are staying up!

Thanks B!  You are amazing and you deserve a huge bonus!